Raam... a journey from Man to God!

Lately I’ve been listening a lot on how Ram is bad or how Ramayana is pointless. So I started to dig deeper to determine why some of them do not believe or are against our ancient history and one of its heroes. I wanted to know why there is this trending ideology of rejecting our ancient history and what is so attractive about that trend. Because we do not question our recent history, though it is written by the winners, but we are questioning events as it is. We believe in our biased history books and not in our unbiased ancient history? I did not quite understand why this was the case.

I wanted to know what Ram’s mistake was. Was he wrong in taking up vanavaasa? Was he wrong in taking Seethe along with him to forest? Or was it him making Southern India free from Asuras and Rakshasas? Is it wrong to eradicate public’s miseries and re-establish order and discipline? Or was it his mistake that he fought an entire war only with the help of Vaanara Army and killed Raavan just to bring back Seethe? Or is it wrong that he respected what Seethe had made him realise and made amends in the rules and administration of his kingdom?

Everybody said he doubted her chastity so he sent her back to the forest and that is why he is a wrong man to be worshipped. If he was sure of doubting seethe, why fight a war, risk his life and bring her back to Ayodhya and then doubt her and then send her to the forest? He could have just left her in Raavan’s Lanka know?

Just imagine, a huge population unanimously worships Ram, isn’t it a miracle? Though they also know all the major events that happened in Ramayana. When such a huge population wants to worship Ram in his birth place what is wrong about it? Did they tell you not to worship your God? No, they just want to worship theirs which has been happening from thousands of years not from yesterday.

Any way I am no one to comment on his life but I will pen down MY UNDERSTANDING of the promising story of Ram and Seethe. I’ve no intention of changing people’s opinion but just to put out one of the many perspectives on Ramayana. And why I would choose Ram in all my lives if given a choice.

Let’s begin from the very beginning…

First let’s understand our existence, dependence and the concept of God.

We all know as humans, we cannot exist independently. We are dependent on various things. For example air: we cannot survive a moment without air. We are dependent on food from plants and animals. Plants are dependent on insects for pollination and animals on other animals. We are also dependent on other human beings like farmers, carpenters, doctors, technicians etc. If we think we are big man in this world and egoistically exploit everything we are dependent on, it is our foolishness. So instead what we should do is, be thankful for everything and bow down. Because we would not be alive if not for EVERYTHING in this world.

Lets take an example of simple insects which we think are very insignificant creatures. If insects disappear from the face of the earth, it is said that within 50 years ALL forms of life on this earth will vanish. But in the same example, if Humans disappear from the face of the earth, no big deal to the universe, it even flourishes better. So it is not our modesty to be thankful and respect them, but it is our responsibility. And anything we bow down to is God for us.

So in Indian culture we have all types of Gods, Two-legged Gods, Four-legged Gods, Aquatic Gods, Crawling Gods, cross-breed Gods, Flying Gods, Nature God, Sun God, Moon God, Air God, Fire God, Water god, Knowledge God etc etc etc.. We also consider our parents and also husband as our God. Our female Gods are much more powerful than male Gods.

Not because God refers to someone who has super powers, But because anything and anybody who is responsible for our survival is our Superior. And we give them all the respect in the world. If we don’t, it makes no difference to them, but we will be on our lowest self. And that is not how we live life is it? We want to live as exuberantly as possible and be an example to our future generations.

Let’s take a scenario. You and some others are dying in a desert without water or food. You have no hopes of life, everybody around you is suffering and dying. A man comes across you, gives you some water, food and shelter… also, takes charge and makes arrangements for life to flourish in that desert. What would you say to him? “You came in my life like a God and saved my life” that’s what I would say. We would respect him so much, and even be ready to sacrifice ourselves for doing such a favour on us. We would worship him because if not for him, we would be dead.

That is where Ram comes. He lived his life as best a human can. Though his personal life was a disaster, Each and every being of that era were living their best life, that’s why it’s called RamRajya.

So given an option to you, to choose a king for your country, who would you choose? A ruler like Ram whose whole kingdom was his family, who puts country first over his personal life OR someone who wants authority/power just to make personal life better?

He has set a standard for humans to live, show me people living upto it. Hardly 1% of them. Compare your every characteristic/personality with every one of Ram’s. Will you be able to say you are upto his standards? Especially people with authority like Ram’s. When people cannot even reach his standards, go on to say he was a wrong man with one reason. What do you make of it? I see only ego.

Ramayana is our history, imagine if he had not taught his public, how best one can live, by now our generation of world would’ve been such a mess. Or it would have already been destroyed.

Indian culture was never built around God. We called ourselves Bhaarath named after the ruler. And we followed Sanatana Dharma, which is literally translated as “Eternal Custom”.

Eternal - lasting or existing forever; without end.

Custom - a traditional and widely accepted way of behaving or doing something that is specific to a particular society, place, or time.

Sanatana Dharma is a way of life. It is not a religion as such. Bhaarath-vaasi never knew religion. Sanatana Dharma explains how best a human can live life. For example

•        Ayurveda - science of medicine and surgery.
•        Yoga – human body mechanism, to keep our body healthy and working.
•       Science of cooking - Satvik – Rajsik – Taamsik.
•        Phases of one’s life - Brahmacharya (boyhood); Grihastha (married/sansaari); Vanaprastha (Retirement); Sanyasa (renunciation/vairagya).
•        Vedas – Rigveda which talks about Spirituality; Yajurveda which talks about Mathematics and Trigonometry; Samaveda which talks about Art, Music and Philosophy; Atharvaveda which talks about Diseases, Psychology and Problems one can face.
•        Varnas – Brahman - Priests, Teachers and Intellectuals; Kshatriya -- Warriors, Police and Administrators; Vyshya – Farmers, Merchants and Business people; Shudra – Artisans, Workers and Employees.
•        And a hell lot of other stuff.

Sanatana Dharma is the user’s manual for human life. Our culture was never about God. We worshipped our kings, our nature, creation etc.

External invaders who invaded Bhaarath called us Hindusthan based on the geography, land between Himalayas and Sindhu River. This was the only part of Bhaarath that was connected to land and other three sides covered by ocean (of course there are other definitions). And hence the name Hindusthan. And whoever lived in this land were automatically called as Hindus by our invaders. We all know this don’t we?

There is no way a person can exist without at least one part of Sanatanadharma. It is not a religion. You worship whoever but you automatically are inside this, only because you are born a human being, no other qualification required.

So when we say we worship Ram as God, doesn’t mean he acquired super powers and became God. No. He never claimed he was a God. For the very man he was, he became God in our lives. He was the care taker of this land we live in. He showed people how you can maintain sanity even in worst of the worst situations and why it is necessary in the long run, by living the miserable life himself.

Even when he was still Prince Ram, people of Ayodhya were so in love with Ram. When Manthara asked Kaikeyi to stop the coronation of Ram, She advised Kaikeyi to ask the pending boons from King Dashrath. FIRST was to crown Bharatha. And SECOND to send Ram to forest for 14 years only because, if Ram stayed, people of Ayodhya would refuse Bharath as King. Such was their love towards Ram. If one person is madly in love with the king, you can call the person insane. But when whole kingdom is in love with its king, will you call whole kingdom as insane? When in a kingdom, King loves his public as much as the public loves him, how flourishing will the kingdom be?

When Ram was leaving for forest, people of Ayodhya insisted on going along with him. Because they knew if they follow a true leader, he will guide them towards success even in forest or even in hell.

Ram’s brothers were devoted to him not only because he was the eldest, but because he was such loving, caring, understanding and guiding elder brother. Laxman’s devotion towards Ram went to the extent of taking vanavasa on himself with sole purpose of serving his brother and his wife. Imagine you had a younger brother, can you proudly say he would’ve been devoted to you? Not because his devotion was great, but because you are such a human being?

When Bharath learns of the developments happened in Ayodhya, he goes to the forest along with family to convince Ram to come back to Ayodhya. But Ram inturn convinces Bharath that, Ram’s duties are not only limited to the boundary of Ayodhya, but also to whole of humanity. And that’s why, he must go on to fulfil his father’s promise to Kaikeyi. We all know leadership doesn’t mean passing orders, but walking along with people to their success milestones. It is a great responsibility, it’s not to be under-estimated.

To talk about Seethe and her devotion, basically Seethe as a woman as a human being, I will have to make a different story. So I will keep it limited to ram’s life. So Seethe had to convince whole of family, guru and sabha, give logical reasons to everybody’s questions about her going to forest with Ram. When everyone insisted on her staying back at palace, her determination to undergo forest dwelling and devotion towards Ram is exemplary. 

Seethe’s life style, her beliefs, her understanding, her philosophies, her personality as a whole impacted Ram in such a way that he says, Without Seethe Ram has no existence. He respected all her choices, he answered her questions, he listened to her insistence, and he always tried to learn from her and never impose anything on her. He had an unshakable faith in Seethe’s intuition. He also explains his actions to her from time to time, be it administrative or personal. He always asked seethe’s opinion or perspective before making any decision. I can go on and on. These apply the other way round also and much more.

When Seethe came across widows and children of the Asuras Ram had been killing, her heart melts and she questions Ram that, How is it in doing his duty, he is also disturbing lives. Then Ram gives her question a comprehensive thought and promises to give one opportunity to everyone to become a good person before killing them. And he keeps his promise until the end.

She played a big role in Ram’s life. He knew it. She had her contribution in making a wonderful personality of Ram himself. He acknowledges it. The Man who was always composed, calm, well behaved, alert and sane all the time, loses his balance when he learns seethe is missing! He gives up eating, sleeping and resting, continuously goes on searching for her. He talks to the things seethe used. Talks to plants, flowers, trees because seethe was connected to them, asking if they knew her whereabouts. The Man cries uncontrollably, feels the immense pain.

Continuing his search, he learns from Jatayu, that Seethe is abducted by Raavan. He feels rage inside him, also the urge to rescue Seethe immediately and care for her. But Raavan went away with a Vayuyaan – Pushpak and Ram did not have one to go immediately. So he again composes himself and decides no matter how long it takes, no matter what it takes, He will bring her back.

On the way he fulfils his duty towards Shabari and Sugreeva. The Man doesn’t forget or ignore his duties and responsibilities towards his public though his personal life is at stake. Sugreeva volunteers to lend his VaanarSena to fight against Raavan. 
On his journey in search of Seethe, Ram tends to grieved kings and exploited public. He could’ve called upon the most powerful kings and his own army to fight against Raavan, but Ram being a vanvasi at that point, chooses to fight with the help of oppressed class of public. Provide justice to the aggrieved and gather them in the War of Righteousness, he became one among the exploited group and fought like a common man.

The war was not between two powerful kingdoms, it was between Raaavan’s golden Lanka and a Vanvasi whose wife was kidnapped. It was a war between Dharma and Adharma. It is a proof that even the powerless can win against the powerful, IF you are on the side of Dharma/Righteousness.

Raavan was more powerful than Ram, in army, warriors and allies. Raavan was the most learned scholar, greatest devotee of Shiva. His ten heads are symbolic of the amount of knowledge he had. He was a great warrior, his skills were timeless. Overall he was an intense personality, so anything he does is with great noise. He happened to do Adharma also with equal intensity. There was no way to stop him and make him a good person again, there was no other option but to kill him.

After the war, Ram knew that public of Ayodhya would not let Seethe be in peace. He knew they wouldn’t spare her. But he wanted to protect his Seethe from all the accusations, taunts and bad mouthing. He had always protected her from anything that could hurt her both physically and psychologically. So he asked her to go to her parent’s kingdom, and she would be safe there. That is when Seethe insisted on giving Agnipareeksha (symbolic), not because she wanted to prove to the world about her chastity. But she wanted to prove that she was strong enough to face/fight anything that the world threw at her.

So then they went back and things looked fine for a while, Seethe got pregnant after the long wait of 14 years since marriage. It was an occasion of celebration. Ram learned about a dhobi- Bhadra who is accusing Seethe of immorality and also that he would never accept her if he was in Ram’s place. Bhadra was doubting his own wife and taunting her every step of the way.  

Ram was taken aback, his worst fears were manifesting, which he thought should never happen is starting to happen. He was shattered, confused and lost. He was the King not sanyasi anymore, he had to do justice to all his responsibilities.

He consulted Rajguru Vasishtha. What if he had to choose between responsibilities of a King and as a person/son/husband/father? To which guru replied that when a person becomes a king, he will not have an option to choose. His first duty is towards the public and then his own.

He consulted his mothers. Is a woman’s life defined by society? To which they replied saying, no matter how learned a woman is, how much efforts she put in, how much determination she has, no matter how successful she is… she has been defined by the society all along. And the society will continue to do so. But what could she have done about it in those times.

He was talking to seethe. He said, he had to make a decision, but it concerned him greatly in personal life also. She replied that for a king, nothing is more important than his public and as for his personal life, she would always respect and support his decisions.

He went to the public in disguise, Bhadra was being interrogated by public that why he disowned his wife for a trivial reason. Bhadra replied that the reason was not trivial, his wife was in another man’s shelter while returning from her parents place. And he asked the people gathered there, whether they would accept their wives if they had been in another man’s shelter for even one night. All the people said they would refuse. Though this was stereotypical, it was happening. Bhadra's wife was refusing the accusation, but no one cared to consider.

So all done and dusted. No one gave him the opinion he wanted. Ram was furious of all the accusations and decided to renounce kingship and move far away from Ayodhya to live a simple happy life with seethe, like old times! His brothers begged him not to do it again and reminded him that people of Ayodhya will become lifeless without Ram. He replied, Ram himself is lifeless without his seethe.

Ram went into introspective thoughts and realized that, if an able man refuses to take charge, things fall into wrong hands and get exploited. Like in our present world, there are more miseries than joys, not because people are doing wrong doings. But because right people are silent, ignorant and isolating themselves from larger responsibilities. Now we know women must be protected, trusted and respected… but how do we know this? Long ago and at the time of Ramayana it was completely male dominated society.

By male dominated society I don’t mean male-chauvinist. Just male-dominated. Because life had been that way, men took care of businesses, men took care of earning, women took care of household. As time passed, men’s ego started showing up… to an extent male-dominance is necessary but if it crosses the line it becomes male-chauvinism. Men stopped giving importance to women and exploited them. 
For example, Raavan’s wife Mandodari. She could not do anything to stop any of it. She was not consulted in any decision making. Her opinion did not matter in administration, household and even in her children’s life decisions. She helplessly watched all her children being sent to the mouth of death by her husband himself. Her advises were not considered, her warnings were not considered. All she was allowed to do was look from afar at everyone and at life itself just pass by. But she chose to protect her husband and make him more powerful by placing the Amrith-kalash in Raavan's stomach. She realized it was a mistake later and suffered consequences.

Another example is Dashrath’s wives. They were respected ofcourse, not as bad a situation as with Mandodari. But all decisions were made by king, he was advised by only guru and the ministry, his personal life was least important. All the queens could do was pray and hope for good things to happen. 
In case of Kaikeyi, Dashrath agreed to send Bharath to Kaikeya-kingdom though Kaikeyi insisted otherwise. When he was away, dashrath resorted on getting Ram’s coronation done immediately without even telling the queens until the night before. Kaikeyi was dejected and heeded to Manthara’s advice. Though Kaikeyi was happy for Ram’s coronation, she felt betrayed and conspired against. It was her reaction that led to vanvas, not action.  

In those times, Ram was a kind of man who always sought seethe for advice. He always respected her decisions and choices. And he knew it is because of Seethe by his side, that he was able to achieve success. That is also why he was so protective of Seethe, not let anyone or anything hurt her. In extreme situation he decided to send her to forest.

Though every minute of every day Ram was suffering the pain of separation from Seethe, he ruled wonderfully well. Time passed. Luv kush were born. They learned Ramayana from rishi Valmiki and were protesting about what seethe had to go through. They sung Ramayana in Ayodhya and all the sacrifices Seethe made, then everyone of Ayodhya realised their mistake.

When everyone came to seethe to try and convince her to come back to the palace as if nothing happened, she said that it would prove everyone’s doubt was true. 
She said in a society where women are given no social respect and status, she could no longer live willfully and that the society had won in making women a subject of control. 
She tells Ram that there was no need to conspire, to send her to the forest, like always, even now she would respect his decisions and willfully agree to dwell in forest. 
She gave Ram the realization of the plight of women at the time and said, if she does not fight and agrees to go to the palace, it’s the defeat of whole female species. She has to fight and represent the strength so that women will always fight back against any exploitation instead of suffering in silence. 
She made him realize that just being a good husband did not work out well for her, it is his duty as a king to bring transformation in the minds of public.

That is when the actual feminism took birth, the real feminism, not the one that is trending now.

It was executed and maintained by Ram. He knew what he had to do to repair the damage. If this transformation had not happened then, now we wouldn’t know how to fight for ourselves. But now feminism has reached its extreme which also should be avoided.

Ram made rules and regulations, provided rights, and made amends in administration for providing equal status-protection-respect to women, to give equal share in paternal and husband’s assets and many more. He made sure woman's voices were heard and respected for a long time.

Living life after Seethe was his biggest challenge especially after he understood what women were going through. And responsibility of making his public understand it as well. Devise rules for them, make sure they are following it, and if any difference opinion arise among people solve them too. But never let Seethe's sacrifice go in vain. Fulfilling seethe's dream of treating women equally and respectfully was his only mission.

All we see is he doubted her. We do not see that if women are respected today that is because of Seethe's sacrifice and Ram's administration. We are proud that we know to respect women but we forget we were taught by SeethaRam. If not for them women were at great risk.

My dear readers, my knowledge is limited, I always strive to learn more. And this topic that I am talking about can be made into whole huge book and it will never end. I cannot hold the battles in my mind when I hear that One thing where Rama actually suffered, being labelled as his life’s summary. May be this is also because my paternal-ancestral family deity is Lord Ram. So forgive me for any mischief I might have made above. If need be I will make this my comprehensive study subject and write more and more. But for now I thank you all for reading my budding write-ups.